Clay Aiken is gay! And the sky is blue! And the grass is green!

If he were a ’super gay’, now that would be a story…

September 24, 2008

So I saw on the news this morning that Clay Aiken has officially come out of the closet. Is this really news?
I will try not to make a joke about the “microphone” in this photo.
*struggling* argh… ok, I’m good.
But seriously, this is a very duh moment. I think even People magazine, which is featuring him [...]

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Infomercials and a Penis Pump Approved by Medicare

July 14, 2008

For me, Infomercials are a love/hate relationship. Often they sneak up on me when I’m rocked back in a barcalounger in some sort of late night trance, one hand on my crotch, the other on a tepid beer. Seventeen minutes will pass by until I snap out of my hypnosis and think, “What the fuck [...]

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Plant Sex and My Nose

May 29, 2008

Allergies are killing me slowly. With each sniffle and wipe from my aloe infused Kleenex I feel the life force slowly draining from my body. Pollen floats about brazenly in puffs of dust and even giant cotton balls that take flight from our cottonwood trees. Stupid plant sex. Just seeing this stuff makes me cringe, [...]

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